Dear biscuit,

Life at the compound is becoming more bearable as I have convinced dear Shilo to purchase two more emergency mascaras for me.  All the dancing children have sent me into a frenzy of frozen tears.  Please send help as soon as possible - there is a trap door behind the photo of me in the blue brocade gown in the kitchen pantry.  In it, you will find my favorite Chanel booties, an extra credit card, and an extra large jar of Nutella.  I've heard a rumor that there will be 200 children invading this concrete prison in the next few days, and I know my nerves will not stand. 

Send love to baby Tina!

Madame